Christmas can be exciting and magical – but it can also bring big changes in routine, sensory overload, and social expectations that feel overwhelming for many neurodivergent children. With a few thoughtful adjustments, the festive season can be enjoyable, predictable and meaningful for the whole family.
On this page, you’ll find quick, practical tips across the following key areas:
We hope that these tips help your family create a calmer, more inclusive festive season that supports your child’s needs.
Please remember, our Neurodiversity Support Hub will be open up until 1pm on Christmas Eve (reopening 9am on Monday 5th January). Whether you need practical advice, emotional support or simply a listening ear, we’re here for you.
Call 01727 833963 or email supporthub@add-vance.org to speak to our team.
Talk about Christmas and what this means for your family – creating family rituals and routines repeated year after year is a lovely way of creating special memories in a more predictable way.
Consider what sort of a Christmas day your child may prefer. Sometimes as parents we may think an excitement driven day is what is wanted but perhaps calm and predictability may be their choice?
Use a calendar or visual timetable to cover the entire holiday season, including:
Make a booklet or social story about Christmas with pictures of Christmas trees, decorations and Christmas food. Consider if your child takes things very literally, they may become anxious if your Christmas does not appear exactly as in the pictures!
Involve your child in changes to the house, e.g. take them shopping for decorations, let them handle decorations, let them see decorations being hung up, or let them help putting them up.
Enable your child to be in control of things which might overload them e.g. scented candles, flashing Christmas lights. If possible, give your child direct control (like the button for the lights) or provide sensory defences e.g. ear defenders or sunglasses.
Incorporate a Christmas activity that you know they enjoy into their daily schedule, e.g. opening the advent calendar, or switching on the tree lights.
Create decoration-free zones in the home e.g. their bedroom.
Prepare your child for specific events e.g. by showing them photos of where you are going and how you will get there, and planning what you will eat or wear.
Agree a secret hand squeeze or “code” to say they have had enough. Leave within 10 minutes (warn family and friends this will happen so no time for goodbyes/hugs as this could add a lot of extra time!).
Rest and Recover
Spread out social activities across the festive season with rest days in between, to give your child time to recover.
Support your child to pack themselves with plenty of time to prepare what to take beforehand. This will help them feel in control and less anxious. Take self-soothing objects/activities.
Discuss whether they would like their presents wrapped and consider alternatives e.g. leaving presents unwrapped, wrapping in cling film or including a picture of what’s inside on the gift label.
Introduce presents one by one, instead of all at once. Some children prefer to open just one per day! Set a limit on the number of presents, e.g. one from Mum & Dad and one from grandparents.
Try to avoid the concept of ‘good’ and ‘naughty’ lists as this can cause huge stress if taken literally. Think about where Father Christmas will leave the gifts – many children worry about a ‘stranger’ coming into the house or into their bedroom.
Ensure batteries are accessible should a particular toy require them! You could even consider taking the toy out of the box, assembling and/or inserting batteries so it is ready to be played with immediately.
Prepare your child for any changes to meals, cutlery or table set-up e.g. by involving them in laying the table or agreeing the seating plan.
Keep the daily routine the same as far as possible, including on Christmas Day. Ensure they have a copy of the schedule with them at all times so they can remind themselves what is happening and share it with others.
Allow your child to escape to an agreed ‘safe place’ at key moments that may be stressful, e.g. when other people are opening their presents. Reassure them it’s ok to use this and prompt if necessary.
Build some free time into their daily schedule when they can engage in their special interests. This should help keen anxiety levels down.
Ask for support from friends and family, e.g. a grandparent could watch your child doing a favourite activity while you help your other children to decorate.
It’s easy to forget your needs amongst the stress of Christmas. Call on friends & family for help so you can enjoy the things you love about Christmas, such as your favourite films, food and events.
Remember social media is a highlight reel. You do not need follow other peoples expectations.
Get ideas from other families, and share your tips with them on our private Facebook group:
Please remember, our Neurodiversity Support Hub will be open up until 1pm on Christmas Eve (reopening 9am on Monday 5th January). Whether you need practical advice, emotional support or simply a listening ear, we’re here for you.
Call 01727 833963 or email supporthub@add-vance.org to speak to our team.